For Bitter or Worse
by Lelila Solo
Summary: AU: Callie and Owen are married, when Owen comes back from Iraq he's changed. Prompt from a friend who wanted to know what happened between them that led to the comments they made in the "What If" episode.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: This if fic is AU based off of the "What If" episode of Grey's Anatomy where Callie and Owen are married with three children. I was prompted to write this fic by my friend Fabiola, who wanted to know what events the couple had to get over, as Callie told Addison that she thought they were past it. I went a step further and added details explaining why Callie would fear for their children's safety.

I'm not sure if this is complete or if I'm going to continue it. I guess we'll see what you guys think huh?

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><p>Owen Hunt was a soldier.<p>

He was a good man.

He was honorable.

He loved his country.

And that was why Calliope Torres had married him. They had met when she did a stint with the Peace Corps. She'd been enamored with him from the start. He was so completely different from her and her life; he changed her, for the better. When he'd joined the army to be a trauma surgeon, she had reluctantly accepted it and held her broken heart together with tape and glue. The uneasiness never quite went away, but when he proposed the night before his deployment, she couldn't say no. She'd waited anxiously for nine months. Being a surgical resident while being pregnant was difficult, but doing it as a single mother was more impossible than she had ever imagined. Her daughter, Allegra, had been born without complications. A beautiful six pounds and five ounces with a head full of hair. And when Owen had returned, he was a far better father than she had ever imagined that he would be. Their wedding had been enchanting. The church was old and very Catholic, appeasing her mother. Her dress was traditional, white, with sleeves that reached down to her wrists. Owen hadn't understood, but she'd insisted. Her veil was a replica of her mother's. Her father kissed her cheek and handed her away. And soon after she was pregnant again, this time with twins.

Owen had gone away on her second tour when the twins were a year old. Allegra was three. And she was left as a single mother again. But this time she was a Seattle Grace Cardio Attending and she had Addison to help her. They got along just fine and welcomed Owen home again with tears and huge smiles.

But Owen was changed.

The man who slept beside her was no longer the man she married.

He wouldn't talk to her about it, no matter how much she begged him. He wouldn't go to therapy, saying that it was for the weak. He would get better on his own. He just needed time. He stayed away from the children. He was rarely at home, getting a position at Callie's hospital as a Trauma Attending lended him excuses about overtime. The time he did spend at home was spent on his computer, talking to his war buddies.

"Owen?" Callie called tentatively upon arriving home from work. "Honey?"

"In here, Cal," his gruff voice met her ears. He sounded happy, so she told Allegra to run ahead and see him. She had a kid on each hip and she wanted to put them down for a nap. But not two minutes later, Allegra burst into the twin's room in tears.

"Baby, what's wrong?" she asked, crouching down after she laid the twins in their cribs.

"Daddy told me to go away. He said I was bothering him," she sniffled. "Why is he always on the computer?"

Callie sighed, enough was enough. It was bad that he had little to do with her anymore, but she could deal with it. His lack of interest in his children made her angry. She wouldn't let him get away with ignoring his daughter like this. "Let me go talk to him."

Her feet carried her quickly down the hall to the computer room where Owen was. She leaned against the door frame. "Owen."

"What the fuck do you want, Callie?" his tone had changed. Every little thing sparked this residual anger inside of him.

"She just wanted to say hi."

"And then she pestered me with questions."

"She was in here for what? Two minutes? She misses her dad. You're hardly ever home, you never talk to her or play with the twins. They never see you. She just wanted to talk to you," Callie tried to make him see what he was doing.

"Just get out."

"No," Callie stood firmly, arms crossed. "Talk to me."

He stood, suddenly, but she didn't flinch. "About what, Callie? You don't want to know what happened over there. You don't know."

"I would if you'd just tell me," she took a few steps towards him. "Just talk to me, Owen. For better or worse, remember? If this is worse then this is worse and I'm going to be here for you. You said that you would get better."

"Calliope."

She took another step towards him, reaching out for his arm. "Mi amor, mi corazon," her hand touched his arm.

His fist closed around her throat.

She choked, clawing at his hand.

"Shut up," he snapped.

"Mommy?" their little girl's voice came. "Daddy! Daddy no!" She ran over and began smacking her small ineffectual fists against his leg. He pushed her aside and she stumbled to the ground. His fingers released Callie as quickly as they had taken hold of her. "Don't try to seduce me, you stupid bitch."

"Owen," she begged, having immediately dropped to the floor. Allegra was okay, just upset. Callie looked up at her husband with tears in her dark eyes, "Please, I love you."

"Then leave me the hell alone, and keep them away."

Cutting her loses, she left the room quietly, tugging on Allegra's hand. Allegra questioned her, asking why Daddy was hurting her, and why had he pushed her. Callie tried to explain that he was reacting the way he would have in the war.

"But he's not in a war," Allegra said. "He's home."

"His mind doesn't know that yet," Callie soothed. She caught her reflection in the mirror. Her neck was red, she would have a necklace of finger prints tomorrow. It wouldn't be the first time. But it was the first time that her child had witnessed it. She could sense the fear in Allegra. Her mind was reeling. His reaction time was getting faster. If he could turn on her that quickly, what was stopping him from hurting Allegra, or the twins. What if he had another nightmare? Would he sleep walk into the babies' room and smother them the way he'd tried to smother her two nights ago?

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><p>He stood in the doorway to their bedroom that night. He told her that he was sorry, he hadn't meant to upset Allegra. He slept on the couch.<p>

The next day was her day off. She had planned to cook a big meal and try to coax Owen back into the family atmosphere. He'd seemed happy again as he left for work, giving her a kiss on the cheek. But she'd seen Allegra flinch when he tried to give her one. He told her that he was looking forward to dinner, he seemed normal. After Allegra declined his offer to get her on the bus, he just smiled and said that he'd see them later. But one of the twins had woken up sick and she'd spent the entire afternoon at the doctor's office, her dinner plans completely derailed. So she picked up pizza on the way home. Owen was supposed to be off work at six anyways, so they would be getting home just before him.

Except he didn't come home. She'd almost expected it, but her hopes had been up this time. Dejected, she stuck the pizza in the oven and watched a movie with the kids. An hour later, she put them to bed. And then she waited in the living room for him to show up. The clock on the wall filled the silence as it ticked off seconds and minutes and then an hour until the lights of his SUV flashed across the windows, highlighting her face for a brief couple of seconds. Unbeknownst to her, tears had been slowly rolling down her cheeks. As he walked onto the porch, she turned the outside lights on and opened the door. She could smell the alcohol on his clothes. "You missed dinner."

"Well, I'm hungry so I'll eat now," he brushed past her.

"The kids were excited. Allegra thought she was going to get to sit next to you," she said evenly.

"Well, she didn't seem too excited to see me this morning," he snapped. He stumbled into the kitchen.

"That's because you scared her yesterday," Callie snapped back.

She followed him into the kitchen. "Where is dinner?"

"In the stove," she told him.

He opened it and pulled out the pizza box, "Is this a joke?"

"What?"

"Is this a goddamn joke, Calliope?" he threw the pizza at her.

Her hands immediately came up to block it. The leftovers tumbled to the floor, splattering tomato sauce against the linoleum.

"Clean it up," he spat before turning to the fridge.

"Excuse me?" she looked at him, astounded. He'd never been the man to order his woman around like she was his servant.

"I said, clean it up," he whirled back around. The look in his eyes struck fear in her.

She stood her ground again. "No."

He grabbed her wrist and threw her down. "Do your job."

"My job?" she looked up at him, rubbing her wrist.

"What happened to dinner?"

"You just threw it on the floor, you bastard," she'd had enough.

Before she could move, he grabbed her hair and forced her up. Then he smacked her hard across the face. "You're my wife. There should be a hot meal waiting for me when I get home."

She didn't hold her stinging cheek. Her pride wouldn't let her. She wouldn't let him see her as anything but strong. A creak in the floor made her turn. Allegra was standing in the hallway, her eyes wide with fear. "I had a sick kid at the doctor's all day. And you didn't even come home on time." She walked down the hall, "Clean up your own damn mess."

* * *

><p>He was in their doorway again that night. "Callie."<p>

"Go away, Owen."

"Callie, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

"Our daughter saw you again tonight. She's terrified of you," she turned towards him.

"I don't know what's happening to me," the apology ran out of him like water. Tasteless. "I'm sorry. I'll never hurt you again."

"Don't make promises that you can't keep, Owen," she said.

"I can't believe this is happening. This was perfect, we were perfect, what happened?"

She was at his side in an instant, holding him and calming him. He cried into her neck and she assured him that they would be okay, they had to be. Her whispers stopped and her eyes closed when his tears turned into kisses as his lips found the shallow of her neck. His hands began to slide over her body and she felt heat grow between her legs. It had been a long time since he had wanted her. "Owen."

"Don't," he whispered, catching her lips.

She gave in to him. She let his lust overpower her will. He started groping at her, his tender caresses becoming hard and powerful. He ripped the shirt off of her body. Shutting the door, he advanced on her like an animal that had been caged too long. She didn't care, the fire in his eyes exhilarated her. She needed him. He pushed her back on the bed and pulled her underwear away from her core. She groaned as he thrust two fingers inside of her. It hurt slightly, she wasn't wet enough yet. Then he stepped out of his clothes and laid on top of her, pining her to the bed. "Touch me more, kiss me more. I'm not –"

"Quiet," he said softly. His hands held her arms above her head and he thrust into her.

She cried out in pain when he filled her. It was too hard, too fast. "Owen, stop."

He thrust again, oblivious to her cries. She bit her lip, holding back the pain. It would subside in a moment anyways. She let him fuck her until he was finished, hoping that maybe this would bring something out of him and they could get back to where they were before. He collapsed beside her, smiling. After a whispered thank you, she got up and went into their bathroom. Tears and smeared mascara stained her cheeks, covering the hand print that was imprinted there. Her right cheek was swelling. Her wrists were red with bruises in the shape of his fingerprints clouding her skin. Blood was trickling down her thighs from his ferocity.

"It's not his fault," she told herself. She cleaned her face off and wiped the blood from her legs. She brushed her teeth, brushed her hair. She looked in the mirror one last time and forced herself to not see the bruises on her face and neck. "It's not his fault."


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: _I love that those of you who told me to not finish this did so on anon and because you said I portrayed Owen as a wife abuser. I have three issues with your issues._

_1 - Let's recall that Owen physically manhandled Cristina on several occasions before addressing and while recovering from his PTSD in the show. In fact, he choked her._

_2 - I always do research before I write a fic like this. Unless something is a fluffy domestic scene or pure smut, I do research. PTSD takes many forms. Just because you have personal experience with ONE or TWO forms of it, does not mean that you are capable of diagnosing it, treating it, or telling someone that their form a PTSD it too irrational._

_3 - THIS WAS AN AU EPISODE. ALTERNATE UNIVERSE. Meredith was happy. Arizona was bitter. Derek and Addison were still together. Lexie was a drug addict. Callie was scared of Owen. She kept her distance from him, physically. When they kissed she leaned only her head into him. She didn't even really kiss him. Her eyes were open and she was alert. She kept the stroller between the two of them. That kind of unconscious separation does not come from engaging with a person who has sunken into himself. Owen punched a glass window so hard that it shattered when Cristina was badgering him. I took all of my cues as to his aggressive state of mind from the episode itself. I was not writing Owen as he is now. I was writing Owen based on the episode as he was presented. It's called characterization. And adaptability._

_I get that Owen is your guy, but please remember that where he started is not where he is now and that the episode this stemmed from was not a canon world episode. (He was also drunk when he raped Callie, and NO ONE can say what alcohol will do to someone much less what it will do to someone suffering from PTSD with aggression issues like Owen has.)_

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><p>When he woke up the next morning, his first instinct told him that Callie was gone. Rolling over, he realized he'd been sleeping sideways on the bed all night, covered in one of those extra blankets they kept laying around. Only on Callie's side were the sheets tussled. She'd also…or maybe it was him…had undressed him and left him naked. He threw back the blanket and sat up. Then it hit him; the hangover. A glass of water and two Advil were laying on her bedside table. Guzzling them down, he tried to think for a moment. Last night was a blur. And he didn't know where the red streaks smeared across his thighs had come from. Confusion was competing with the hangover.<p>

Throwing on some old pajamas, he went downstairs with the intention of inhabiting his office for the day to talk to some of his war buddies. He really didn't want to see the kids. He wasn't sure that he wanted to see Callie either. She just didn't understand, and the kids couldn't understand. All he saw were guns and helicopters and sand and blown off appendages. He couldn't revert to normal. There wasn't an off switch for his war mode this time. Work was trying enough. He wasn't trying to hurt her, but he wasn't the same man as he was before.

A pizza box, upturned, caught his eye as he passed the foyer. With a frustrated sigh, he went into the kitchen. Pizza was everywhere, smeared across the floor. Banging his fist into the linoleum, he picked up the larger pieces and threw them away. Those damn kids.

An image of Callie cowering on the floor flicked behind his eyes but he shook it away. _Where was Callie anyway? Where were the kids?_ Dropping the box into the recycling bin by the back door, he heard the front door open. Stepping back into the foyer again, he saw his wife coming in. "Cal?"

He watched her freeze.

"Do you realize what a mess those kids of yours made?" he snapped. He didn't have time for this.

She turned to face him. "What?"

"There is fucking pizza everywhere," he said, crossing his arms.

"That would be your fault," she said.

He got a good look at her face then. It was sobering, making him stagger back a step into the wall. "Callie."

"What?" When he didn't answer, she raised an eyebrow at him.

The fingerprints around her neck were fading, but a dark black bruise followed her beautiful jawline. "Where…where are the kids?"

"Addison's," she said shortly. "Asleep."

"Oh," that struck him as odd. "Why…what do you mean the pizza is my fault?"

"Do you not remember last night, Owen?" there was venom in her words, but her tone was so low he hardly heard her.

"No."

"You need help. I'm serious this time."

"Tell me what happened. I'm so sorry, Callie. I didn't mean to hurt you," he took a few steps towards her.

"You came home drunk," she said, holding out her hand to motion for him to stay where he was. "You threw the pizza and the box at me. You hit me, threw me down. Told me that it was my job to clean up your mess. Our daughter watched you. She's scared to death of you. Then you…I don't want to say that it was rape, but…"

His face paled. For once in so many months he actually looked like himself.

"This isn't you, Owen. This is not my husband. You need to get help. I just came to get some things. We are staying at the Shepherd's."

He watched her walk up the stairs. _He hit Callie? That bruise was from him?_ He looked back at the kitchen. _What else hadn't she said?_ The door to his office was open and inviting, but instead he opted for the bathroom. Running cold water, he splashed his face and stared at himself in the mirror. _Who was he?_ Nothing felt normal. He had thought the stress and anxiety were under control, a beer wouldn't hurt. But one had turned into too many. He couldn't even remember what he had done to his wife.

Her footsteps fell on the stairs and he came out to watch her leave. The exhaustion in her eyes went on forever. She gave him a hug. "Get help. Or I'm leaving and taking the kids with me back to Miami. Please Owen. I love you. You can still be the man I know you are."

"Callie," he didn't know what to say. "I'm sorry."

"Prove it."

The door clicked shut behind her. He'd been saying that a lot lately.

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><p>"Hey, Allegra woke up, but I got her some juice and sent her back to bed," Addison told Callie when she got back to the Shepherd's house. It was more of a mansion on a hill though. Derek had spent a year having it built on land that he'd bought in the middle of the forest outside of the city. Callie wasn't even sure how he had found the place. But the house was beautiful and she was grateful for the sanctuary.<p>

"Thanks," Callie said. Her arms were loaded with the kids' duffle bags that she had thrown together last night after making sure that Owen was passed out. If they needed anything else she would have to go back to the house when Owen was at work. "The twins are going to be up soon, wanting to have breakfast. Do you mind if I borrow your kitchen?"

Addison took the bags from Callie and sat them on the floor. She pulled Callie into her. "You are exhausted. Tell me what to do; I've helped you with them enough to be able to take care of them for a few hours. I already called the hospital and took a sick day for you and me. You need to go to bed."

"No, Addie," Callie tried to disengage. She needed a distraction, not to lay in a foreign bed and let awful thoughts run rampant in her mind. But her friend was right, exhaustion wasn't going to help the kids either. "It's fine. They'll be confused enough as it is."

"A few hours won't hurt them, Callie."

Both women jumped. Derek stood behind them on the stairs, smiling sadly.

"You should listen to my wife. She doesn't like it when she doesn't get her way," he said. "We can take care of the kids for a few hours."

Defeated, Callie gave Addison another hug, "Thank you." She climbed the steps, a yawn betraying her, and made a left down a hallway to an empty guest room. Allegra was in the other guest room and the twins were in a crib in the living room.

"Do you need anything, Cal?" Addison asked, having followed her up the stairs. She was on the verge of terrified for her friend. The two women had grown really close since the Shepherds had moved from New York to Seattle.

"No, oh no," Callie said sleepily. "You guys have done plenty as it is. Just, just feed the twins the food in the…blue bag that I put in the fridge. Come get me if you need me. If Allegra wakes up again–"

"I can feed her, Cal. We have plenty of cereal and stuff," Addison said. She ran her fingers through Callie's hair. "Go to sleep. Shower. Take care of yourself. We've got the kids."

"Thank you, Addie. Really," Callie yawned again. Addison pulled the door closed after she went into the room and she fell asleep before she hit the pillow.

Addison was worried for Callie. The bruises covering her closest friend's face and neck were sickening. She knew that Callie and Owen were having problems, and frankly she didn't understand why they were still together. They were just an extremely odd couple and didn't quite look right together. But as long as Callie was happy, she didn't question it. It wasn't her place. Now she was beginning to think that Callie needed to take the kids and run. But she was also worried for Owen, who obviously wasn't getting help that he desperately needed. When she went back downstairs, Derek had the twins on the couch with him, watching some cheesy cartoon that she was sure made him want to gag. He smiled up at her and she nodded to let him know that Callie was asleep before heading to the kitchen to get the twins' breakfast ready.

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><p>She was leaning against the nurse's station, chart in hand. He was watching her from down the hall, unsure of whether or not it would be okay for him to approach her. He was starting therapy the next day. He just wanted her to know but Callie hadn't looked up. A shaky breath had his feet moving. "Cal–"<p>

Derek stepped in front of him, tossing a look over his shoulder to see whether or not the woman had looked up. "Owen."

"Hey," the former soldier scuffed his foot against the tile. "H-how is she?"

"Tired," Derek said. "But Addie is helping her with the kids and they are getting along fine."

"I just wanted to talk to her," he said, trying to see his wife over Derek's shoulder.

Shepherd shook his head. "It's not a good idea."

"Can you just tell her that I'm doing what she said. I'm getting help. Tomorrow, I start," Owen fumbled over his words, afraid to relinquish his pride.

"I'll let her know." Derek said, softly. When Owen nodded and turned away, he called out, "You're doing the right thing."


End file.
